Adjusting to two kids

8.09.20171:09 PM


The reality of life as a mom to two little girls has fully set in since my mother in law left, I think having some helping me with the girls made life a little easier. But then all that fairy tale living came to an end about a month ago, and with my hubby working too it's been mostly me and the girls during the day so I have had to learn some tricks to help make life a little easier these days.


  • Plan, Plan, Plan! I am still very much working on this but I definitely do a lot better, with two little ones things can easily fall through the cracks so I have made a conscious effort to stay ahead of the ball, making sure to write down plans and organize my day ahead of time so as to not get into a situation where I am forgetting stuff or become stressed out. I even installed the Evernote app on my phone, just to help make my life a little chaotic. I literally write down my to do list for the week on there, shopping list and just a space to write down thoughts that cross my head. It helps to brain dump everything, because if I don't do that best believe it will be forgotten.
  • You can get a lot done during nap time, let's be honest sometimes when the baby naps I kind of take it as time to just seat down and enjoy a few minutes of zen time ( which is so needed every now and then)but if I did that everyday my house would be in shambles lol. So when ever the baby naps sometimes I literally have to force my 4 year old to sleep then, so that way I can get a little bit of laundry done or finally have time to do the dishes that have piled on all day.
  • I have learnt to wake up earlier, my body clock can't sleep past 8 a.m anyway, and with waking up early in order to breastfeed it's really hard for me to go back to sleep and sleep deep anyway, so I use those early hours for me time. I try to get some exercise in first thing in the morning when my husband is still home and while the kids are still on low energy or sleeping. Also it's a time for me to reflect, so even if I don't exercise that day I use that first one or two hours of my day to read my devotional and help start my day off on a good note. I noticed doing that really has helps to calm me and mentally prepare me for whatever the day will throw my way.

Honestly it's not easy having two little children and lately I feel very outnumbered, I truly have no idea how people that have 3, 4 or even 5 little children (you guys are the true MVPs) do it.  It's probably gonna always be nerve wrecking and a constant battle in my head of making sure I am raising them right and being a fair mom and sharing enough time between the baby and my 4 year old. I would really love to know how you mom's out there balance it all?

Big sister update

7.31.20179:44 PM

So Temi is growing and changing each and everyday, we have all had to do some adjustment but I think the person who has had to adjust the most is big sister Simi. She has had to go from being an only child, to taking her big sister role extremely serious and taking extra (actually a little too much) care of her little sister.
Dress: Similar style here; Shoes: here
I was quite worried about a baby coming along and messing up her routine and I will be honest it has been a little bit of a shake up from her norm which was expected but thankfully she has been such a good sport about it and also being my little helper I am so impressed. Here are a few ways I have been able to help transitioning from only child to big sister (and to be honest I am still learning on these things and in no way an expert, but these are some ways that have worked thus far)


  • I involve her in everything or at least on most things. Like being my little helper around the house or when I have to run errands I take her along. Simi easily feels left out, and since Temi has come she is extra whinny and needy (even more than her sister lol) so I help to curb that and mentally check myself to make an effort of doing this everyday.
  • We do something completely for her, whether it be going to the pool or park but just something to entertain her  and keep her busy. This has worked out so far for us because it keeps her busy and by the time we are done she is all tired out which means nap time or early bed time lol
  • I let her be a big sister with boundaries though (lol I know that doesn't really make sense) Simi is a super hyperactive 4 year old and I know she is very excited to have a little sister, but her excitement can get a little out of hand and she has to be reminded her sister is still a baby and she has to be chill with her (a work in progress here lol)


All in all it's been a wonderful experience thus far, and she has definitely shocked me with how she has adjusted to all the changes. Of course every experience is different and each child is different from the next but I would love to hear your experiences as well as what worked or what is working for you all?

Temi: 3 Months Update

7.05.201711:44 AM

Our precious Temi is growing up everyday, and with each day comes new lessons and  changes. This past three months have been an adjustment not even gonna lie, still getting used to our new addition but it's been full of so much loving on her, and cute baby cooing.




EAT
She is still quite the eating machine, not so much on the hour her feedings are a little more spread out, now we are at about 2 hrs or 3 hrs stretches and eats about 5 to 8 times per day. She is still being exclusively breastfed as well, and since she is missing no meals, she is growing and looking very healthy.


SLEEP
We are still very much on newborn schedule, but it's been a bit of a difference from the early days. She isn't taking as long of naps  or as much naps through out the day so that allows her to sleep better at night and a little longer stretch. Most nights she is down for sleep at about  9 or 10 P.M and will sleep till about 4 or 5 A.M before waking up to feed again.


PLAY
This girl loves to play, she loves smiling and even will have a lil baby giggle here and there. She is definitely a social butterfly, and is especially social and vocal in the early morning hours. Always chatting up a storm about something and ready to share a smile with any face she sees. She loves belly tickles, and just recently learnt to make bubbles with her mouth don't get her too excited though or you will get a big drool pool lol.



All in all the last three months have been a fun ride, big sister has also been a  huge helper and her number one playmate. It's so interesting watching her grow up and transform and learn new things each day.

How I style/care for my 4year old's natural hair

6.27.20171:33 PM

Growing up my hair as always been super FULL and super THICK, which is something everyone admires  but I am not a big fan of because doing my hair is such a hassle. When I got pregnant with my first daughter I made a decision that I wasn't going to put any type of chemical in her hair such as a relaxer/perm, I know the amount of damage relaxers did to my hair especially my scalp so I just wanted her hair to flourish and do a lot better than mine. But as God would have it, she has the same exact hair texture as mine from fullness to thickness (it's a pain doing her hair let me tell you). So to avoid her hair breaking, I have had to learn some hair care routines for her hair over the years.



  • Conditioner is our best friend! I make sure to deep condition her hair every week, it gives the hair moisture and makes it easier to comb through (her least fave part lol)
  • LOC Method, when I started my natural hair journey and started researching ways to care for our hair, moisture and moisture retention was major key! And one of the ways I learnt to help is the LOC METHOD (for all you new to natural hair care, that means liquid, oil, cream) I try to use this method especially after deep conditioning while her hair is still wet, I put oil in her hair (using any of my fave either coconut oil, olive oil and the one we are currently using Jamaican Castro oil) then lock in the moisture from the water and oil with any type of cream based hair lotion ( I am a big fan of the shea moisture creams) 
  • Protective styling goes a long way.  In order to prevent breakage we stick to a strong protective styling schedule and not messing with her hair too much, thank God I have learnt how to braid her hair and style it in different ways and also with the help of the internet (Instagram pages) I am able to get fun ideas on ways to style her hair as well.



I will be honest I am no master at this, but these are some things I have learnt over time that work for me. What/how are some ways you all take care of your little ones hair?

Raising Confident Little Girls

6.14.20171:45 PM

A few weeks ago, I was doing my 4 years old hair and she said something very interesting that got me thinking about how I am raising my girls and the changes I need to make moving forward. Anyway back to the story, so while doing her hair on the bottle of the hair creme I was using on her hair is a drawing of a black woman with very curly/full Afro in an  up-do, she looks at the picture and goes "mommy she has ugly hair" I look at the picture and then I look at her and I say what do you mean? She then goes "its not beautiful like Elsa's" I was so confused and honestly wasn't sure what to say in that moment. Yes of course Elsa has beautiful hair I am not disagreeing with her on that but, my shock was more on the fact that she didn't think this black woman's hair depicted beauty or that she felt this pale white character with long blonde hair was more beautiful than the black lady. So when I finally got my thought together I asked her, why she thought the lady in the picture's hair wasn't beautiful like Elsa's, I then made a point to let her know that the lady in the picture had the same type of hair as hers, did she not think her hair was beautiful?


That moment wasn't only a teachable moment for her, but also for me because it got me thinking what am I showing as representation for my girls? What am I teaching them? Your kids learn from not only what you tell them, but also what they see. And we live in a world where thanks to the internet and social media beauty and standards on beauty are all one set standard and I don't want my girls having to live their life thinking there is only one type of beautiful. It's funny when I got pregnant the first time I wanted so badly to have a girl  and to dress her up and do her hair and just have my own life size barbie, but being a parent is obviously more than that but...... being a parent to a girl is extra more than that (lol that's not good English kids). I don't have the tips to raising confident little girls in our social media driven world, and every child is different, but the biggest take away for me from this experience is that I have to be the role model that I want my children to have. What I want my children to learn and see in the world is what I need to depict to them every single day. Society already makes it hard enough to be a girl, as a parent I need to make it just a little easier on them and be ahead of the world in molding them.



My Postpartum Reality

5.23.20178:26 PM

Its been almost two months since Temi has been born (check out her birth story here), Its been quite an adjustment to not only get used to having a newborn around but also just back to being myself. I realize having a baby does a lot to the body not only physically but emotionally and this past two months I have spent time not only getting to know my new baby but also getting back to myself. Like I said in previous post this pregnancy was a lot different this time around than the first time, my body felt that difference the most, after I had my first daughter my snap game was on point but this time around I am learning that its a process. I have heard the saying "it took 9 months to grow this child so it will take time for your body to return to what it was before". After the first month I noticed that my belly stopped going down, I knew that my uterus was done shrinking back to size (cause those awesome cramps were done) Anyway it started to make me worry because I expected my body wasn't gonna bounce back like first baby, but I didn't think I would still be looking 6 months pregnant after the baby was out. So of course I started to google and research the heck out of everything, in my research I learnt about Diastasis Recti. Pretty much what that means, is my abdominal muscle is separated a little more than the usual separation you get from pregnancy and thus is causing the wonderful pooch I have been rocking post baby. Its been a struggle coming to term with how I look right now, and of course along with my wonderful pooch I am still carrying quite a bit of weight and not back to my pre baby weight just yet.

Dress c/o pinkblush
But a couple of weeks ago I decided I was gonna stop being in my feelings about the whole situation, I can't change my body to become what I want it to be overnight so all I can do is get a better outlook on it all. So within the last week I have started to exercise again, nothing too crazy or intense mostly because with Diastasis I can't do anything too extreme. I also decided to start actually dressing up (enough with the sweatpants lol), I still can't quite fit into all my pre-baby clothes but thankfully I have been able to find a few items that I feel comfortable in like this beautiful PinkBlush dress, its very free and airy perfect for this wonderful Texas heat and the off-shoulder is very much on thread which I love.

Pregnancy is one of the most rewarding and beautiful periods in a woman's life honestly, but it does put your body through quite a bit. Sadly we live in world today where women have a baby and the next day they are posting their washboard abs (which is definitely goals lol), and people want to pretend like their lives are perfect and peachy. But the reality is most women have a baby and they probably never see their abs again or they probably never lose that baby weight but that is fine, the most important thing for me during this time is making sure I am mentally intact and I am present for my children and love them the right way than beating myself up because my body doesn't look the way some strangers does a minute after they had their baby last week. I am enjoying this time and respecting that my recovery and body isn't the same as the next.


How Motherhood has molded who I am today

5.14.201712:41 PM

I know most of you have heard the saying, "becoming a mom changes you" I never quite understood what that saying truly meant till I became a mother myself. Everyday I thank God for blessing me with my amazing little girls that get to call me mommy everyday, being a mother is one of the greatest blessings in my life and I can't see my life today without my two little girls in it.

They have thought me how to be confident in myself and sure in my decisions. Prior to being a mom I would say I was "fake" confident, more worried about what others thought than what I thought. But, something about being responsible for other people's lives gives you a new found confidence.

Being a mom has definitely grown and strengthened my relationship with fellow mothers in my life, especially my own mother. Growing up I always thought my mom was just being mean and didn't want me to live my life. Now I am on the other side of the field and I understand why she did the things she did for me, as a parent you want to protect and shield your kids especially in this crazy world we live in today.




Motherhood has definitely impacted my relationships, when you become a mother you are more much more aware of the people you allow in your life, not just because of yourself but you want to be sure these are the right kind of people you want around your children as well.

Being a mom is hard work, and every day is learning and trying to make the right decisions in your life because now your life reflects more than just you but your children too. I am not sure how good of a job I am doing at this whole motherhood thing, but I only pray and hope that I am giving my best at this job every single day.

Wishing all you mama's out there a wonderful mother's day!


Its Our Anniversary: 3 Things first year of Marriage taught me!

5.10.20179:48 PM

And just like that, we have been in this marriage game for a year lol. No but seriously how does time just keep flying by though? I swear it feels just like yesterday when I was standing in our Westin Hotel room looking out at the crazy dark clouds that were forming outside on the day of our wedding and now a year later another little human has been added to the crew and I am trying to figure out what we will be eating for dinner, yes quite a bit has changed in a year. But I wouldn't trade it for anything, the other day while doing my nightly breastfeeding I got to thinking about this past year of being a wife and I realized truly everyday has been a learning experience, so I thought I would share the few key things this past year has taught me.


  • If you bottle it up, you end up losing: This was very hard for me the first few months of our marriage its very hard for me to express myself because I don't want to be a bother to others, so I would much rather just brush it under the rug. But in my case, brushing it under the rug just means we push it way back in and then I end up just resenting you every time you do that thing. But clearly being married to someone and planning to spend the rest of my life with them, its not really easy to just resent and be angry with him so I had to learn to speak up right when something doesn't seat well with me. Marriage is majorly about communication!
  • Fighting Right and fair: I remember when we went through marriage counselling, the pastor had talked to us about fighting right and fight fair. I think at that time I didn't quite understand what he was getting at, well I learnt that I definitely don't fight fair. In part it had to do with not really speaking up and so when you bottle things up for so long you blow up and then you end up blowing up to someone who has no idea what they have done because you haven't communicated that with them. I still am working on this, and I am sure it will continue to be a work in progress but I think the fact that I am aware I do this is a step in the right direction. 
  • The reality of marriage: Not gonna lie before getting married I always had my own idea of what marriage is and I am gonna tell you that was all a big pile of B.S lol. Thanks to social media and just the world we live in, the idea of the wedding is sold on a bed of roses, but marriage isn't really praised. This first year of marriage has opened my eye to the reality of just that, coming from a long distance relationship to being a married couple there has been quite a bit of adjusting we have had to endure and also moving out of that idea of me and you to now us.

Marriage is definitely not easy and everyday is constantly bringing your A+ game to make it work past just the surface. Each day we continue to learn more about each other, and our lives also continues to grow. Not sure what the next years will bring but I am sure there are plenty more lessons to be learnt. 

Temi: One month update

5.06.20172:57 PM

Our little cutie is a month now, how did time just fly by though? Its been a little bit of an adjustment getting used to having a baby in the house again and not getting much rest but, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. She has changed so much within the last month, she literally is growing up by the minute and slowly outgrowing newborn size and on to the next.

EAT
Like I said she is gaining weight like crazy, and that is because she is a lil eating machine, constantly ready to eat. From the day she was born breastfeeding has been an ease and because of her eating so good it has really helped my milk supply. She was born at 7lbs 9oz, but at her last doctor's visit she is was 10lbs 10oz, her doctor said that she is feeding perfectly fine and this little lady is right on track with her weight gains and growth pattern. 


SLEEP
Sleeping is still quite the struggle I will be honest, but she is slowly getting a hang of this whole night and day concept. The first few weeks she was home, she would sleep through out the day an then at about midnight she would wake up and would be up for the rest of the night. Lately she will stay up a few hours out of the day, at least a good 45 mins stretch that she is up for during the day and then will take naps off and on during the day for about 2 hours stretches. Most nights I get a good 3 to 4 hours sleep out of her so mama is getting a little more rest (bags are reducing lol) She also loves to be carried, so my mother in law does spend most days carrying her on her back (African style) and we have been co-sleeping as well, because she just won't sleep on her bed for longer than 5 mins (hoping that changes soon)


PLAY 
She doesn't quite understand the concept of play and big sister does try to play with her, but because she staying up longer during the day we get to play with her and spend a little more face time with her. She also smiles quite a bit (I know she isn't really smiling with us, but we love the idea that she is lol)

  

Its been quite the month honestly, filled with lots of dirty diapers, cries but loads of baby love. I can't wait to see what other changes are to come with this little one. 



Why we gave our daughters traditional Nigerian names

5.01.201710:13 AM

For most of you who don't know, I am Nigerian born and raised (hence the name lol). Growing up I never really thought any big deal to my name because everyone I knew had Nigerian names and it was just the norm. I didn't really start to appreciate my name till I moved to the United States, of course it took a little while to appreciate the fact that my name was unique and  had a wonderful meaning behind it. So when it came to naming my kids I was very certain I wanted them to have unique names as well.

  1. One reason why we wanted our kids to have traditional Nigerian names is because we want our children to learn about their culture fully and by carrying traditional Nigerian names we are already starting the learning process. You don't know how many times people stop me when they first see my name or hear my name wanting to know the meaning or just learn a little bit more about myself and where I come from. We believe by giving them their names, they get to learn and hopefully be able to teach someone about the country their parents bought grew up in in and be proud of it as well.
  2. We gave them traditional names because, like I said earlier its unique. Yes of course there are plenty of Simi and Temi's out there in the world but, the fact that they both are growing up in the United States  makes their name feel a little extra unique, and special to them.
  3. And lastly we wanted names with meanings and meanings that would resonate with our own history. We could have easily given our girls names that most of the people they would interact with are familiar with or "Americanized " names but what fun is in that.
I am a strong believer that the names we are given is to help us start writing our history, and I am confident that the names we picked for our children does just that. I think when my girls look back on the names that we have selected for them it's something they will appreciate for years.

March 27th 2017: My Birth Story

4.19.201711:48 AM

The baby is here finally!!! Its so true what they say, every pregnancy is truly different and you can't compare each pregnancy to each other. This was my longest pregnancy (only been pregnant twice), with my first daughter I had her at 37 weeks, so automatically I was hoping that since this was my second pregnancy then she would most likely come around the same time boy was I wrong. Once I passed the 37 week mark, I started getting very impatient and seriously uncomfortable so at that point I started trying ever remedy from eating pineapples, to dates, seating and bouncing on a yoga ball, walking all over the dang place, sex and even had my hubby pressing on any and every pressure point lol (by week 39 I was so over being pregnant I could pay anyone to get this baby out). So when I woke up at around 5am March 27th (the last days of 39 weeks) feeling extremely crampy and feeling slight contractions I was slightly excited, but then on the other hand was like dang how long will this last though. At about 6am the pains started getting a little more intense, I could still talk through them, but they were definitely more obvious so at this point I was like I need to wake my hubby up, If this labor was similar to my last then this baby would be making her arrival sooner rather than later. To be honest I think God worked it all out perfectly, because my mom was in town (that was my biggest worry, was having someone to watch my older daughter) So I took a quick shower, me and the hubby got in the car and drove off to the hospital, The entire 20min drive I feel like every contraction that came was intense but I kept thinking "what if I get to the hospital and they tell me this baby is no where near coming out that I should come back" lol. When we finally arrived at the hospital at about 7:20am since I had already come in previous to going into labor and filled out all the hospital paperwork, they checked us in and put me in one of those monitoring room the nurse checked how much dilated I was, at this point I was 5cm. So we were transferred to a labor room, I hooked to all the machines, poked all over my arms cause my veins clearly didn't get the memo and the real fun began. Since I was able to have a natural birth with my first child, I had mentally put myself to a test for the second child to see if I could do it again with out epidural, lord was the pain real! but I think my body was moving off pure adrenaline and the fact that I would be able to say I had both my babies without an epidural kept me breathing through the pain lol. At about 8am, I started feeling more pressure, so at that point since my water still had not broken and I was about 9cm dilated the doctor decided to break my water herself. Thankfully after that it did relief the pressure, but then within a few minutes I could feel the baby coming out the strong intense pressure (The true ring of fire). And then pushing started, the doctor came telling me to breathe through my pushes (that's easier said than done by the way) I swear I felt like I was pushing forever, and this baby was not coming out any more lol. It felt like I pushed for like an hour, but really it was maybe 10mins and by 8:30am our beautiful baby was out. At 7 Ibs 9oz she definitely was bigger than her sister, but a long lil babe (21inches), her dad got to cut the cord, and then I was able to meet my beautiful girl.


After delivery we got moved to the room we would be spending the next 48hours in. Also big sister and grandma came and met the baby for the first time. Due to my round ligament pains during pregnancy, my body was 100 times more sore this time around compare to the first time around. I am not much of a medicine taking person, but I was feeling so much pain that I had to take some stronger med than just the regular over the counter pain med. The next few days was sleeping, getting my belly constantly pressed on (every time the nurse came I seriously wanted to punch her lol), lots of breastfeeding and loving on our new baby. We got to head home by the 29th since the delivery was good and baby was doing awesome.  My pregnancy and delivery was definitely a little tougher on my body this time around, and its obviously going to be a different healing process this time around. But I am so blessed to have this little girl and be able to raise her, I can't wait to see how she and her older sister interact with each other and the bond they will share.


Soon to be big sister

3.23.20179:10 AM

So my life is finally starting to slow down just a bit, but I almost feel like its just the calm before the storm. This last week I got to spend some much needed mother and daughter time with my fave girl (my daughter) as much as we are all excited for this new addition, I realized that very soon she will no longer be an only child and of course I am not sure how that will all play out, one thing I wanted to be sure of is letting her enjoy to the fullest these last days, as well as getting to enjoy being a mom of one before it all changes. So thankfully, since this little munchkin doesn't seem to want to debut anything soon, it almost seems like everything just aligned perfectly. Last week was spring break for my daughter, and since I have been off of work we took the entire week to bond and get myself out of the house walking as well.
To be honest even though there were a few days where I was gonna lose my mind because of how exhausting some days were, and I just couldn't keep up with her energy (I kid you not she could literally go all day and not be tired once, well except on car rides lol) But being around her each day made me just realize how crazy everything in life is. To think just 5 years ago my life was at a completely different place, and the thought of being a mom wasn't even something that had remotely crossed my mind. But when I look back on my life today, I wouldn't trade being this little girl's mom for anything. She has completely changed me, in so many ways the things that I would take for granted before and not pay a second glance to before I have learnt to appreciate even more. I was 23years old when I had her, and I was scared out of my mind of what kind of mother I would be to her. I was still finding myself, and now I would have to lead this little person's life and do the right things, and honestly I haven't mastered this whole being a mom thing and there are still days when I miss my life prior to being a mom but I know God has placed me right where I ought to be.


Its been a blessing to see this child grow up and bloom into this ball of personality and joy, I am not sure how all these changes will affect her but I do know one thing that she is gonna be the best big sister ever. She tells me everyday "our baby is going to be the best ever" and that just reassures me as a parent. To know that I have had a hand in helping raise this child that loves and cares so hard and in her little and sometimes overbearing ways wants the best for her family. She matches to her own drum and is not afraid to let her personality shine no matter what setting or person she is with. As I go from baby 1 to baby 2 I won't even lie to you how scared I am , but just knowing that this baby will have the best big sister ever makes it very comforting.

2017 so far Life Update

3.08.201712:37 PM

This might just be my own year, but honestly 2017 has just been a crazy busy year so far. I feel so overwhelmed and constantly feeling like my to-do list never gets done, and it is always rolling over into the next day. And lets not even start to talk about living life with a toddler, and then getting ready for baby, so yes 2017 has gotten off to a crazy busy start. But thankfully its time to finally get some much needed rest, and focus on baby watch (I am so ready for this little one to be out already, I think I am counting down the seconds now lol)


Anyway with all the busyness of the year so far, there have been a few eventful things. For one my baby turned 4, I still can't believe I have a four year old toddler. It amazes me every year when she turns a year older and all these new characteristics form and just seeing her mature it truly is something to experience as a parent.


I also got my life together and beat this laziness just a little bit and packed my hospital bag, you would think this was my first child with how clueless I was about what to pack or where to even begin. But thanks to this baby center article, it gave me a general idea of what I needed to put together without packing my entire closet.
I am officially on maternity leave which is something I never got to actually enjoy with my first baby, so this time around I am truly taking a break to relax and not just physically get ready for this baby but mentally. And also enjoy some time with my daughter, seeing as she is probably going to be affected by all these changes the most so just trying to make her last few days as an only child the best I can. Granted its no walk in the park, cause my body is exhausted and I feel like I am cranky all the time (Jesus take the wheel lol)

Cultural day at school

And with being off work now, and I have lots of time to get the house baby ready and I think my nesting instinct has kicked in majorly, and also my toddlers' (home girl is constantly trying to sweep lol)
I have no idea what the rest of 2017 has in store for us, but I am excited also nervous but very excited for all the changes to come and how our lives are going to change within the next few months.



Baby #2: Expectations vs. Reality

1.17.20179:20 PM

If you follow my instagram page, then you are aware that I am pregnant with baby #2. I am so excited for our family to be growing, and to be able to welcome this new little one into our home. Of course being pregnant with baby #2 is a little different, the symptoms I felt with my first pregnancy compared to this one are completely different a lot of things that I thought would be different are not and a lot of things I thought would be similar are definitely not.  

My first pregnancy I would say was a walk in the park and didn't really set me up mentally for other pregnancies to follow. The first time around I had no signs of morning sickness, nausea or any of the weird symptoms people describe in their first trimester. I was quite exhausted but I think based on the job I had at the time I would have been exhausted regardless lol. So of course this time around I was hoping for the same symptoms, boy was I in for a big surprise. I didn't actually get morning sickness, but I was definitely nauseous the entire first three months of pregnancy. To be honest if I had just had morning sickness and been done with it I probably would have preferred that. But instead I just felt sick to my stomach almost every single day, everything made me want to puke but never actually made me and then I was super sleepy. I mean I could literally sleep at the drop of a dime.



The first time around, I think I didn't show till about the third trimester. I mean my belly was growing but it was more of the cute omg you are pregnant bump. This time around, i kid you not by 8 weeks I had a bump. My belly was so big by 15 weeks my mom even told me that I should probably ask the doctor to verify my due day lol (so rude). This entire pregnancy I have been spotting a belly and of course I understand its my second child so plenty of things that happened the first time around won't be the same but I had certain expectations i guess.

But through it all I think its just the nervousness of having another child that has shocked me the most. This is because I thought with another baby it would only get easier, I mean how much more could you screw up right? I am at a different point in my life than I was with my first pregnancy (a lot more mature, married and I was mentally prepared for this), but honestly I am very scared of what to expect. Of course I know that every child is different, and it will be a completely different experience with this baby than it was with my first baby but I its just the idea that now I am not just responsible for one little human but an even tinier human, its a very scary thought but maybe this is just me. And I know people are gonna say well you have a husband, which I know but also the thought of us not having any direct family members here to help makes me worry too.



All in all I am sure God will give me the strength to be best mom I can be to the these blessings, but if any mom's out there have felt this way I would really love to hear how you dealt with it and also how you got your other child/children ready for the new addition. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

2017 Goals and Expectations

1.09.201710:35 AM

Just like that we are already one week into 2017 time waits for no man honestly. The other day I was reflecting and just thinking of the new year, since this year started I have felt good about all that there is to come out of 2017, and so many ideas have been flying through my head in regard to goals and just things I have to accomplish. I have learnt to stop making new years' resolutions though because as we all know they never get accomplished. So instead for the new year I am setting goals that I can actually accomplish and making myself accountable for them as well. I thought I would share some of my goals for the year as well as the ways I intend of hold myself accountable.

  1. Having more me time, last year I was more focused on giving so much of myself to others I barely remembered myself though it all. Granted so much was going on last year from planning a wedding, to moving my entire life across country, but this year I have had a chance to settle down more into my new life, so I intend to take at least once a week out of the month to take of myself. Whether it be a day of manicures and pedicures or treating myself to a movie but just taking time alone for myself. Its very easy as a mom to give and completely forget all about ones self within it all.
  2. Being more present in my life, and learning to appreciate those moments as well. Thanks so much to social media and all that comes with it, I find myself more caught up in other people's lives and being lustful of what is going on in their lives rather than mine, so this year I intend to give myself a break. At the end of last year I started making sure that I started each day with prayer and reading my devotional instead of instantly grabbing for my phone and surfing social media. I did notice it would start my day on a different tune, so I intend to keep that practice up going into the new year. 
  3. I am going to be easier on myself this year, something I realized in 2016 is I tend to never really acknowledge the good things I actually accomplish but instead focus on the bad things instead. I am hard on myself as a mom, a wife, a friend, daughter, sibling pretty much every portion of my life. There have even been times when I would talk down on myself, just because I didn't complete something the way I intended to in my head. But this year I intend to focus more on the little wins I do accomplish. We live in a world where EVERYONE is already hard enough on us, why add on more by being hard on yourself as well. I intend of praise myself on every little win, no matter how little they are because at the end of the day little wins lead to bigger wins.
  4. Lastly I intend to be more about action rather than just words. There are so many things I have planned out for may 2 or 3 years now that have just stay a plan, but no real action has been put to it. So this year that will change, I intend to accomplish things rather than just continue to add them to my to-do list. 

Planner purchased from TJ Maxx

With all these being said, clearly these won't be so easy to accomplish but one way I intend to keep myself accountable to with my daily planner where I will document out my days goals and make sure I am checking them off the list, Also this blog will be my accountability partner because I intend to use this space to document my hits and misses. I am so ready to tackle 2017 and make it one of my best years yet. What are some goals you all have set out for 2017?